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It’s Not About the Money: Financial Responsibilities of the Wedding Party
by Grace
Hi. You haven’t heard much from me because I’m not getting married anytime soon. But I am hitting five weddings in the next year, and I’m a bridesmaid in two of them. I’ll even admit that I kind of love them – and not just because I am the queen of getting shy groomsmen out onto the dance floor.
The part nobody likes to talk about is the money part. You hate asking, the bride hates bringing it up, and everybody gets awkward. So I’m going to do you a solid and go ahead and talk about it. No need to thank me – just send that cute shy groomsman my way. Especially if he likes spicy Thai food.
The maid of honor and bridesmaids
• You pay for your own gown and accessories.
• You pay for your own travel and hotel expenses.
• You will probably have some expenses for the bridal shower.
• You will probably buy or contribute to gifts for the bride and for the couple.
The best man, groomsmen, and ushers
• You pay for your own tux rental (or suit) and accessories.
• You pay for your own travel and hotel expenses.
• You will probably have some expenses for the bachelor party.
• You will probably buy or contribute to gifts for the groom and for the couple.
The parents of the bride
• Traditionally, you pay for the wedding.
• Except when you don’t. Many brides and grooms now pay their own way, though if you’re in a position to do so, most couples will be delighted at an offer of help.
The parents of the groom
• You host the rehearsal dinner.
• You may offer (or be asked) to pay for the bar at the reception.
• If it’s within your means, you may offer to help pay for the wedding.
The bride and her family usually pay for…
• The engagement party
• Paper and printing for invitations and save-the-date cards
• Stationery for thank-you notes
• Bridesmaids’ gifts
• Bridesmaids’ lunch or dinner
• The photographer and vidoegrapher
• Transportation to the ceremony and reception for the wedding party
• Flowers
• Decorations for the wedding and reception
• All expenses for the ceremony
• Most expenses for the reception
• Music
• The guest book
The groom and his family usually pay for…
• Boutonnieres
• Corsages
• The officiant’s fee
• The honeymoon
• Groomsmen’s and ushers’ gifts
• The marriage license
But in the end, this isn’t a place to be confined by tradition. If you’re feeling especially generous or aren’t sure you can bear an expense, talk it out. Everyone wants to see this wedding happen, so most people will be willing to work something out.
