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Say Yes to the Dress
by Jen
I was nervous about watching The Learning Channel’s foray into “wedding media,” Say Yes to the Dress.
I think my main fear would be that I’d have the same horrific dilemma as I do with Bridezillas, which is that everything about me hates the show and the nastiness it directs at brides… but if I click past an episode that’s on, I can’t stop watching it. And then I feel all icky and need a shower.
My other concern was about whose side I would land on. Say Yes to the Dress is a reality show that is set in a bridal salon in Manhattan. I’ve pulled multiple tours of duty in the customer service industry, so I’m automatically fairly sympathetic to the staff. But then again, it’s not like I haven’t built up a certain amount of sympathy for the brides over the past few months.
Fortunately, the show seems to be pretty even-handed in the way it portrays the brides and the staff, and it has sort of a documentary feel. The producers seem to be much more interested in showing the process of choosing a dress and the weird little dilemmas that come up than in trashing anyone. The brides I saw all seemed to be essentially nice people, and the staff seems knowledgeable and able to deal with pressure. It’s surprisingly refreshing to see good people doing things well on a reality show.
The show is kind to the brides, even the one with the crazy eyes who was on her fifteenth appointment. It’s also great to see the moment when the bride hits The Dress and shows it to her family. Seeing moms, friends, and occasional grooms suddenly stand up and go “Oh” because the bride looks so terrific is always fun and can be genuinely moving.
And if you like wedding dress porn, this is the show for you. The boutique is a high-end one, so you’ll get your fill of dresses that cost several thousand dollars at a minimum. Even though my budget is a wee bit smaller, it’s kind of fun to watch all the designer confections going by. It’s also not a bad way to narrow down your own choices. I came away from my last viewing with some surprisingly strong opinions on beading.
Things I have learned about trying on dresses from the show:
Try that one dress on again.
You know that one dress? The one you liked when you started trying them on, but it was way too early to pick one without at least looking at a few others? Try that one on again. It’s amazing how many times the dress the bride likes early on really stands out as The One after trying on a bunch of also-ran dresses. I’m talking about eye-pop reactions from brides, friends, and family. So if it looked like it might be a good contender earlier, try it on again.
Deflect your mom until the end.
The moms are not nightmares on this show, but their presence doesn’t make things easier. Your taste and your mom’s taste will almost certainly differ, which means your saleswoman will have to pull twice as many dresses to plow through or wait while you discuss which ones to try. It’s not your mom’s fault – she’ll have a dress in her head that she’s always been imagining on you, her perfect little girl, and it will be tough for her to get past it.
The solution seems to be to bring her along if she wants to come, but keep her out of the changing room. Go through the iffy ones on your own, then pop out to show her the knockouts. Once they saw their daughters looking radiant in their Perfect Dress choices, the moms seemed to melt and agree.
Be specific but flexible.
I used to worry about dictating too much, but it really does seem to help the salesladies if you have opinions on the cut of your dress and on beading, ruffles, trains, gathers, and anything else you can think of. It helps them zero in on good candidates pretty quickly. On the other hand, you have those other sets of eyes there for a reason. Sometimes they can help you see things you wouldn’t otherwise. And every now and then your saleswoman might bring out a completely different dress. She’s not being a jerk – it’s a way to get you thinking in new directions if you seem stuck.
So as mindless entertainment that you can kind of count as thinking about your wedding, Say Yes to the Dress isn’t too bad. And it won’t make you feel icky for watching.
