What To Do When Ruining Someone’s Wedding

Posted by The Broke-Ass Bride on April 16th, 2012

I’ve heard about some bad wedding guest behavior in my day, but I still found this news item particularly shocking. (In short: I guess it started with a little inappropriate dancing with the groom, and ended with the same chick attacking the bride AND a few officers of the law). Which made me wonder - is there any way to redeem yourself after such an abominable display? Hopefully, your bad behavior was much less offensive than Ms. Brooke Burke’s - hopefully, you didn’t 100% ruin someone’s dream wedding. But here are a few tips for reconciling, and carrying yourself with a little dignity in the aftermath, no matter how severe the offense.

1. Keep a low profile. No Facebook status updates the following morning that say “Wow, got way too wasted at Lauren’s wedding last night. LOLZ”. DON’T try to play down your behavior.

2. Be apologetic. If you know you done wrong - don’t go on the defense. When people do bring up the incident, show remorse, and let them know that you’re ashamed and embarrassed of your actions. Don’t try to sell them on the reasoning behind your behavior. In the case of Ms. Burke - she's reportedly married to the groom's brother. Which means there's going to be a lot of awkward family get-togethers in the future. 

3. Give everyone a little distance. Your offensive behavior might’ve stolen the show - but it’s not all about you. Wait till the (hopefully) happy couple returns from their honeymoon to address the situation, if you feel the need to contact them directly. 

4. Write a heartfelt letter of apology. Don’t call, don’t email - write a letter. It may seem old fashioned, but it’s exactly what the occasion demands. If your offense was particularly heinous, leave it up to them to re-instigate contact. (If they never do, that's well within their rights - chalk it up to a life lesson, and move on.)

5. Learn from your mistake. An inability to police yourself in public is a serious sign of immaturity (or a serious problem).  Don't make the same mistake twice - and if you really need it, seek counseling. 

Have you ever witnessed some particularly bad wedding behavior? How was it handled - and how did the offender handle themselves afterward?

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