Ask the Wedding Maven: I Hate Wedding Cake!

By Azure Nelson, Published Oct 8, 2009

Hi, What are some wedding cake alternatives? And I don’t mean cupcakes!! My groom and I do NOT like cake. When we talk to local bakeries they always say, “What about cupcakes?” No we don’t want a smaller cake. What are some alternatives? Is it wrong to just throw out the wedding cake idea all together? Signed, No Cake Please Dear NCP, I’m sure you’re wondering why you’re hearing from me when you originally wrote to our “Ask the Experts” column. The answers to your question are so plentiful and obvious that I decided you really didn’t need a panel of wedding experts, you were really writing in to ask something a little different. Let’s answer your stated question, alternatives to wedding cake: pie, cookies, sweets' table, donuts, fruit, ice cream … I mean really, do you mean to tell me that you and your fiancé have gotten to marriageable age not liking cake and you don’t know what to have for dessert? The question I think you’re really asking is “How much do we have to pay attention to traditions and other people’s expectations and how much can we follow our own wishes?” When it comes to your reception, the only rules and traditions you need to follow are those of basic hospitality. Make your guests feel special and wanted. Feed them and give them something to drink. Only throw the party that you can afford to throw. Don’t make unreasonable demands on your guests or yourself. Be gracious and grateful. Note, this is very different than saying, "It's your day, you can do whatever you want." But, unless you live in a state that only recognizes weddings between a man, a woman, a chicken breast with mushroom sauce, and a wedding cake, you do not need to feed your guests anything specific, including cake. Enjoy, and save some ice cream for me! Do you need wedding advice? Do you have a question about wedding etiquette, traditions, or relationships? Write the Wedding Maven at About the Wedding Maven

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