Picking Your Bridesmaids: 5 Warning Signs She’s Not Ready for the Job

By admin, Published Oct 29, 2012

funny bridesmaids photo superhero wedding party

Your bridesmaids should be super! Photo by Cat Norman via Conversation Pieces

Have a friend (or a few) who just can't get it together? Someone that, no matter where they go or how they travel, trouble always follows? I know I do! And despite these pals' disastrous tendencies, I love them all the same! But... if I were engaged, I would think long and hard before popping the "Will you be my bridesmaid?" question to these friends. And I encourage you to do the same. Because the last thing you need on your special day (and throughout the hectic planning process) is added stress from underperforming b-maids.

So to help you make the right choice when selecting your bridesmaids, here are five warning signs to look for...

She's a perpetual "friend hopper" - If she lacks a core group of friends, or seems to have a new BFF every couple of months, she might not be bridesmaid material. There is a reason (or many) that this gal's friends don't stick around, and you shouldn't have to learn the hard way while planning your magical wedding.

Her own love life is (and always has been) a hot mess - I'm not saying that all of your bridesmaids should be married or in stable, committed relationships. But, it's crucial that each lady understands how special this occasion is to you, your fiancé, and family. And if she has yet to feel that loving feeling, she may not fully grasp it (and may fall short on her bridesmaid duties).

She gets kicked out (or denied entrace) at bars on the reg - No bride wants a wasted nightmare in her wedding party. The groomsmen typically have this base covered, anyhow. But if a friend you're considering for bridesmaid is unable to keep it together when she's drinking at parties, bars, concerts, etc., you can't expect her to stay in line while drinking at your engagement party, bachelorette, rehearsal dinner, reception, etc.

She's forgotten your birthday more times than she's remembered it in recent years - When it comes to being a good friend, remembering a birthday is paramount. Of course, people make mistakes and birthdays can be missed, but if it's a recurring thing with one of your pals, she's probably not worthy of the bridesmaid honor.

Her parents are still paying for her life (and she's been out of college and in the real world for years) - If she is still living off her parents, chances are she's not in the financial position to be signing on for the role of bridesmaid. Being a bridesmaid is expensive, and if one bridal party member can't pony up, your responsible bridesmaids will pay the price.

What other warning signs would you add to this list? How can you tell a friend isn't ready for the responsibility and honor of bridesmaid?

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