About the Man Registry
This week’s post from The Man Registry comes from a member of our panel of groom experts: Groom planning & style expert Simon Daykin. The topic: Operation Dinner Out. You can learn more about Simon and his wedding planning services at Gutsy Groom.
Operation: Dinner Out is a code word from the film “Spy Games” to get Brad Pitt out of a bad situation. So why can't you, as a groom use it to not only get you out of a bad situation with your bride BUT (and here's the important part)... keep you out of that trouble in the first place.
Keeping Your Cool in Wedding Planning Mode
You got the ring
on her finger; her dad says you're good enough. Score one for the good guy (the good guy being you!) Now you have to keep her sane throughout the journey from the ring to the altar, in short... the path to the wedding day. And trust me; it can test the greatest love.
All The Little Details Are Driving You Nuts!
Feeling overwhelmed with all the details
of your wedding is not uncommon. In fact, this is totally normal, don't freak out!
I've been there. Every day she wants to discuss the wedding, the flowers
, the car, all the little details that you never saw coming. That's OK... You’re in the majority. A guy pops the question, she says yes and then all hell breaks loose. This is easy to fix, but most guys don’t know how.
So hang in there and use these 3 words…
Operation Dinner Out
Step 1: Make the decision- Once a week, once every two weeks; take your fiancé out for dinner. Be sure to make a reservation if you’re hitting a popular spot.
Step 2: Choose a new location every time to surprise her- Have you been dying to try a new restaurant? Then take her out to that eatery and really enjoy yourselves. It doesn't have to be crazy fancy or expensive.
Step 3: Prepare a cheat sheet- I'm not saying literally take a sheet of paper with notes on it to dinner. But I am encouraging you to come up with a couple of topics that don't have anything to do with the wedding to spark conversation.
Step 4: Ease her into it- You need a break from wedding talk and so does she (but she might not know it yet). The first time out it might be hard to steer her away from wedding talk but she’ll come to appreciate the break as much as you do. And eventually you'll have your wonderful girlfriend back... not the woman obsessed with planning your wedding (although you love her for trying so hard).
How Do We Lose Our Fiancées to the Wedding?
It comes down to this... she is stressed about the wedding. Your future bride has every single little detail of wedding running through her mind 24/7 and now it’s overwhelming her. Be there when she needs to vent and remember that it will end... eventually.
A big problem that newlyweds face is that their conversations from the time they get engaged to the time of their wedding revolve around the wedding. After the wedding you can only talk so much about how the wedding actually went and then, if you haven't talked about anything else for months and months you're left with NOTHING! You have nothing to talk about and that's not fun. It’s actually really stressful. So you need to incorporate some non-wedding talk into your life right now.
The Man Registry & Simon's Gutsy Groom Advice
Operation: Dinner Out can be a great way to reconnect with your fiancé and start talking about what your marriage will be like instead of what your wedding will be like.
Remember that she's a very busy woman. So make sure that she will be free to go out, because if you plan your night and she can't make it due to a meeting then it'll add more stress to the situation, instead of taking the stress away. Also, switch up the days to make sure it doesn't become tedious. You don't want her thinking that it's Wednesday, time for dinner blah, blah, blah. So switch things up. Try different places, different meals, try a good wine or two.
Take her out and take her away from the wedding magazines, the chat sites and all that stuff. Get her back to normalcy, even if only for a few hours. Throw in a movie and you have 5 or so hours of non wedding related time with your future wife.