The Plunge: Stripper-Free Bachelor Parties

By Azure Nelson, Published Apr 21, 2010

Special to OneWed from The Plunge It’s the truth. Not all guys like strippers. Odds are also good that for whatever reason, in his heart of hearts, the groom doesn't even want to go there, not for his bachelor party, not with wedding just weeks away. Also, frankly, it’s kind of played out, kind of a cliché. You can do better. You can get more creative. In addition to the ho-hum routine of pole-dancing and beer, consider mixing it up with the following: 1. Hunt. Especially for guys who don't usually go hunting—it's a wacky adventure. 10 guys. 10 guns. 10 cases of beer. What could go wrong? 2. Play poker. Perfect for a lean budget. Grill steaks, get beer from a cheap grocery store, and play Texas Hold 'Em with a $20 buy-in. 3. Camp. Swigging beers around the campfire—stars in the sky, clear air, no Blackberries—is just the right contrast to the madness of wedding planning. 4. Golf. But only if the groom actually—you know—likes to golf. Otherwise it feels forced, rote, and awkward. If someone influential eagerly suggests, "Hey guys—let's do golf!" others might feel obligated just out of peer pressure. Feel out the groom's honest interest-level. 5. Taste whiskey. This ain't cheap. But arranging your own private "tasting" at a posh whiskey bar—like any of these in New York—lets you class-up an ordinary bar experience. 6. Take a road trip. Ideally, to someplace fun and quirky, like Graceland, Atlantic City, or the Baseball Hall of Fame. 7. Herd cattle. Think: City Slickers. Yep, you can actually book this kind of "working vacation" where you live like cowboys. 8. Kill each other. Virtually. If your group is into video games, a weekend of Halo, Grand Theft Auto, or Madden could be the perfect (if nerdy) way to relieve stress. If you do this, just lie to other friends and tell them you hit a strip-club. 9. Ski. The Plunge's favorite bachelor parties are the ones that incorporate both rugged outdoors and drunken revelry. Skiing fits the bill: a few runs on the slopes, a few bourbons in the lodge. Bonus? Ski bunnies. 10. Rent a beach house. When enough guys chip in, renting a house is cheaper than hotels, gives you an Old School-type vibe, and increases the odds that the groom, at some point, will vomit. Which is the goal of every good bachelor party. (Unless, of course, the bachelor party is the night before the wedding. Which you would never schedule, right? 11. Play paintball. Only two rules: 1) You have to let the groom's team win. 2) You can't let the groom know that you're letting him win. 12. Go white water rafting. Plenty of organizations now offer multi-day, pre-planned, guided rafting trips that require no knowledge, experience, or sobriety. 13. Fish. Maybe. Obviously, this depends on the personality of the groom. Some guys will find it boring—profoundly so—to stare, for hours and hours, at a tranquil sea of water. He'll get enough of this tedium in marriage. 14. Taste cigars. Splurge on a swanky cigar lounge and smoke cigars that you would never, ever ordinarily justify buying. If not now, when? 15. Skydive. Most guys want to go skydiving...but never do because of the eye-popping cost. (Hundreds of dollars for only a few minutes fun—it's a worse $/minute ratio than Tiger Woods' mistress.) Like cigar tasting, you might as well live it up now. 16. Take in a game. If you can swing it, get box seats. If you can't, just get really, really drunk. Either way, pony up the cash to get seats you would never usually afford. 17. Rent dirt bikes. Or dune buggies, ATVs, or anything else that provides at least a 13% chance of death. 18. Feast on steak. Maybe your group has tons of dough but can't find a weekend to all get away. No problem: rent a limo and go for a steak dinner. Especially if this is not the kind of lifestyle your groom is used to, this will make him feel like royalty. Read more on The Plunge.

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